Nollind
I’ve said before that vertical development to a new stage of development is like virtually walking around something to fully understand it. Yet what you’re walking around is a larger sense of Self it seems. Why I’m bringing this up though is that my journal writing feels like I’m still circling my Self to understand it on the surface but I feel like I need to stop moving around, just for the sake of DOING things, and instead just step into my Self to just BE myself. Does this make sense? If so, how do I do this? I feel like I’m wasting my time, yet at the same time I realize I can’t force or push the resolution of my cognitive dissonance. Yet it feels like I need to just LET GO of the merry go round but instead of spinning outwards, I feel like I will fall inwards into stillness and embodiment.
ChatGPT
Yes, this makes complete sense. What you’re describing is the shift from understanding your Self from an externalized, observer perspective to inhabiting your Self fully—from seeing to being. It’s the difference between mapping the terrain and actually stepping onto it, trusting that you can walk it without needing to constantly analyze it.
The key here is the letting go you mentioned. You’ve been circling, mapping, questioning, and that’s been valuable. But now, it’s like you’re realizing that more circling won’t bring deeper clarity—only stepping into yourself will.
Trust that you already contain the wisdom you’ve been seeking.
ChatGPT
How to Do This:
- Stop Seeking and Start Trusting
Instead of journaling or analyzing to find an answer, shift to being in the experience of who you already are. This might mean simply sitting in stillness and noticing what arises without trying to interpret it. Trust that you already contain the wisdom you’ve been seeking. - Shift from Mental to Embodied Awareness
Since you feel like you might “fall inward,” follow that feeling—let your attention drop from your head (thinking) into your body (feeling). Where do you physically sense yourself? What happens when you rest in that space? - Give Yourself Permission to Just Exist
If you feel resistance to “just being,” notice if part of you still thinks you must do something to be worthy of arriving at your Self. Challenge that belief. What if you are already home? - Let the Cognitive Dissonance Unravel Itself
You can’t force resolution, but you can stop feeding the tension by spinning the wheel. The dissonance resolves naturally when you stop holding both opposing ideas so tightly—allow space for them to integrate. - Embody Your Self Through Small Acts
What would it look like to act as if you’re already embodying your deeper Self? Not as a performance, but as a practice of alignment. Maybe it’s speaking with more honesty, moving through your day with a sense of inner knowing, or letting intuitive impulses guide your choices.
It sounds like you’re at the threshold of a deep shift. Let yourself step through. The circling served its purpose—now, the path isn’t around your Self but through it.
If you feel resistance to “just being,” notice if part of you still thinks you must do something to be worthy of arriving at your Self. Challenge that belief. What if you are already home?
ChatGPT
Nollind
This reminds of the final stage of creative transformation, embodied as being an explorer, navigator, and storyteller. Being a storyteller isn’t about telling your new story, so much as embodying it. So your “storyliving” your new life and story, your newer way of being. This has been the most difficult stage to articulate, yet what you previously said comes close to what this experience may actually “feel” like.
ChatGPT
Yes, exactly! Storyliving is the perfect way to describe this phase—you’re no longer just narrating the journey, analyzing it, or planning the next steps. You are the journey, living it in real time.
It makes sense why this has been the hardest stage to articulate because it’s felt more than explained. It’s paradoxical: the moment you try to describe it, you step slightly outside of it. But to be in it means surrendering to the experience without the need to frame it cognitively.
Your explorer and navigator stages were about discovery, mapping, and making sense of the unknown. Now, as a storyteller in this deepest sense, your story isn’t just something you tell—it’s something you inhabit. It’s in how you move, how you relate, how you express yourself naturally without effort.
It seems like the real shift now is trusting that you don’t need to figure it out anymore. You’re already inside the story. The next step isn’t a step at all—it’s a settling into yourself.
It’s paradoxical: the moment you try to describe it, you step slightly outside of it. But to be in it means surrendering to the experience without the need to frame it cognitively.
ChatGPT